The past couple of years have been a lot. I don’t just mean in a global sense, I mean in a very personal one. There have been several deaths in my family, some career frustrations, some depression, a bit of burnout, and a lot of ‘bodies can be jerks sometimes, ya know?’.
I’m pretty resilient but as things pile up it can be hard to muscle through them.
But I’m not doing it alone. I have a team.
My husband is there to offer me a hug when I'm sad because my grandmother – who was like a second mother to me – is no longer just a phone call away. I’ve also got a strong group of friends who will listen whenever I need it – whether that be about things as big as frustrations about how my body won’t do the things it used to be able to anymore (this ‘aging’ thing is tricky sometimes) or as mundane as the fact my local grocery store has changed their aisles around again.
Some of my other friends text me regularly when I get too quiet in the group chats we hang out in to see how things are going and make sure I’m not spending too much time inside my own head.
What I'm trying to say is that this is a challenging time for me, but it would be so much more difficult if I were doing it alone.
Writing -- whether it be a novel, a short story, your memoirs, or whatever -- is also difficult. So is publishing, if you decide to go in that direction. And it would be even more difficult if you were trying to do it all by yourself.
Don't do that.
Find your people. Find your team.
I like to say that writing is a team sport. And by that, I don't mean that you should surround yourself with a team of people who will all be looking over your shoulder and evaluating every word you type like an annoying aunt telling you 'The red queen is open' when you're trying to play Solitaire. I'm talking about the kind of people who will commiserate and understand when the going is tough, who will kindly kick your tail and help you adjust your expectations when you need it and who will celebrate your wins with you.
Maybe your partner does that, or your best friend? In which case -- congratulations, that is awesome. But you may need a bigger team than that eventually. It's nearly impossible for one person to fill all the roles in another person's life.
My friend, who I share all my Oilers joy and aggravations with is not the same person I would go to for a hug, for example, that would be my husband who could really care less about the Oilers. She and my husband fill two different roles on my team.
You will probably find that with your 'writing team' as well.
Building a team can be challenging and it will take time, but it will be worth it in the end, I promise you. This writing thing is hard. It’s emotionally hard, it’s intellectually hard, it’s just straight-up hard. Whatever you can do to make it easier on yourself is going to be a good thing.
So where do you find potential teammates, you might ask? Well, one good place is conventions -- there are writing-specific conventions, of course, (I especially enjoy When Words Collide in Calgary) but you can also find writing panels at places like Edmonton Expo. And at those panels, you will find other writers.
Another great place to find fellow writers is writing courses. Check out Metro Continuing Education, and continuing education programs at MacEwan University and the University of Alberta. All of these places offer creative writing courses. Some will be quite general and suitable for beginners, and others may focus on poetry, nonfiction, memoirs or fantasy writing. Pick whichever feels right to you and, while you are learning some new skills you may just find a few people whose company you enjoy and add them to your team.
Conventions and classes can be expensive though, I know but the good news is that you don’t need to spend money to meet new like-minded people. Check-in with your local library -- perhaps they have a writing club or a book club that might be a good fit for you. You would be surprised (or maybe you wouldn't) to learn how many people who join book clubs also enjoy writing. If there are no writing or book clubs near you, ask your local writer-in-residence, they may be able to point you toward other people looking for the same thing you are.
Another great place is the Edmonton Literary Ninja group. Don’t worry, I have it on good authority that you don't need to be an actual ninja to join (after all they let me in!). I don't think you even need to be in Edmonton. They primarily meet online and the people within their community write in a lot of different genres and formats. The writers themselves are very diverse as well and are at all sorts of points along their writing journey from ‘writing for the first time’ to ‘several books published’.
If none of those places seem quite right to you, perhaps they gave you an idea of somewhere that might be. If that is the case, please share it in the comments -- maybe someone else will benefit from your insight.
I really do hope this helps you find your team because everything is easier when you're not doing it alone.
Well, maybe not everything -- have you ever tried to do a D&D stealth mission as a group?! -- but most things. And I think writing and especially writing for publication, is one of them.
Good luck!
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